Compare and Contrast:
1. Two years ago, North Cross Mall was full of local businesses. Today, more than half the mall is taken up by a Walmart Superstore, yet another example of the large corporation takeover. But it is important to save small businesses, because they help maintain diversity in the community and keep money and jobs in Austin.
Descriptive/Compare and Contrast:
2. The scene of the nearest shopping center: about fifty cars outside Randalls, ten cars outside of Subway, one or two outside Tino's, a local grab and go restaurant, and three or four cars outside of Berry Austin, a local frozen yogurt restaurant. Over the past five years, there have been a total of seven different local businesses in the shopping center, all put out of business by Randalls. Local businesses are disappearing everywhere and are being replaced by the restaurant and business chains. But it is important to save small businesses, because they help maintain diversity in the community and keep money and jobs in Austin.
Shocking Information:
3. 24: the number of McDonalds restaurants in Austin, Texas. In New York City, there are over 320. You can literally throw a stone and hit a McDonalds in most major cities. This is true for most fast food restaurants, and it is the main reason for the unraveling of the small business industry. Local businesses are disappearing everywhere and are being replaced by the restaurant and business chains. But it is important to save small businesses, because they help maintain diversity in the community and keep money and jobs in Austin.
I liked number 3 ^-^ it was very interesting and it hooked me in more than the others. o-o Number 2 was kinda boring... And Number 1 was also nice but overall, I thought that Number 3 was the best.
ReplyDeleteI like the figurative language used in number 3 but I also really do like number 2. I just can't decide between 2 and 3.
ReplyDeleteI liked the second post a lot, as well. You might want to add hyphens in the phrase "grab and go" because it seemed a little confusing at first. I also liked the third lead, especially your second sentence about the throwing a rock because that gives us a good idea of the number of restaurants and also is a very interesting use of figurative language.
ReplyDeleteI have to say that the second one was the best. The third caught my attention with the rock throwing analogy, but after that I was lost. 2 RULEZ!
ReplyDeleteactually most chains have more jobs then small businesses because there are chains so you cant have more jobs with all local marts
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This is an interesting argument. I'd say I liked the second one the best.
ReplyDeleteTwo seems great it catches my attention states the problem and pushes me to read more
ReplyDeleteNumber 3 was the best due to the more interesting factor and that, its a startling fact. I also like the bold/unbold formatting you did to your thesis and intros.
ReplyDelete~Jiyoon
I liked the last one. it gave me information and a sense of wow that's a lot of McDonals. i do think that you may want to flow from the McDonals to the rest a little bit berry.
ReplyDeleteI liked the last one the best. I think that the part where you said you could throw a stone and hit a McDonalds was really interesting and really good analogy. I also think that it was really shocking to hear about all those McDonalds and it made me want to read your article.
ReplyDeleteI like the 2nd and the 3rd but have suggestions for both. If you go with #2, mention which local businesses got booted. If you go with #3, it doesn't seem necessary to mention NYC's McDonald's -- you just need to talk about how many Austin has vs. how many local hamburger joints it has, for example.
ReplyDeleteGregar, that is totally untrue. Small businesses provide higher paying jobs to local people. Major corporations often outsource jobs and do not buy local products. Buying local products also supports local farmers and other local businesses. So no, chains actually provide less and lower paying jobs and are bad for the community at large.
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